Question: I hear lots of people say “Choice is so important for people with disabilities.” Is it?
Answer: Absolutely. I just had a discussion with my daughter about this. Her chorus group will be performing with students from the special education class. Many of these students are my daughter’s friends. She said, “Mom. We’re singing some Christmas songs, but the teacher picked Hokey Pokey and Itsy Bitsy Spider for us to sing. I get why she would choose that, but it doesn’t feel right for 7th and 8th graders.”
My first question – “Did the students get to pick the songs?”
Sophia – “No.”
My second question – “How can you help your friends have some choice in what they are doing with the song?”
Sophia – “I can ask if they want to do something when we sing, like dance or ring bells. Something they can choose so they are part of the group.”
How can a simple decision to choose a song for someone make a difference?
Asking means you value and recognize the person for what they can offer especially when it involves or can create a change in their life.
Imagine if the students were asked, “What song do you want to sing?” How wonderful…the ideas, the words, the learning of communication, the confidence you could build in someone, the smiles and the excitement in the discussion. The choice the students would make and be proud of in the end.
It’s easy for us to choose for others, but what does that do? Where do we learn responsibility in choice, our likes and dislikes, our voice and how to say what is important to us. Before we make a choice for someone – we must ask first. Everyone should have the dignity to be asked regardless of our abilities, skills and understanding. Dignity should not have any barriers. Taking a moment to ask the students what song they want to sing not only says I value your opinion, but it empowers the person to exercise choice – the first step in decision-making and advocacy for a life they want.